Sunday, February 2, 2014

Reflection of Honors Pre-Calc at the End of Semester One

To be brutally and frankly honest, I can say that this semester did not go well for me and I do admit that it was my own fault. I do own up to this and I accept the grade that I received at the end of this semester with no feelings of unfairity; I only regret that I didn't try harder. Math is definitely not my favorite subject and to reflect back on my crazy thinking of scheduling last year I must have been suicidal to think that I would make a drastic change and begin to like math this year. It is in my character to be overly confident in my abilities and I also harbor a deep blind faith in myself that I would be willing to make a change. This is a fatal character flaw for me. And truth be told, I could have received a better grade in this class but somewhere between 8th grade and honors algebra 2 I mentally lost all will to truly want to excel in math. Yet, I still harbored the attitude of : "Yes, of course next semester will be better for me. I will make changes." I think at this point I have come to realize this flaw but my attitude towards trying still hasn't changed I seem to refuse to let it. At this point I'm going to let this attitude of mine rule me for one more semester and see if I indeed do make this effort for change. My inner conscience is literally yelling: "nope, you are more than likely not going to change", however, I'm going to faith it one more time.

As you have asked for three things that went good for me this semester, the things I stated above is defiantly most of it. I'm not going to say it went good because I did well in a few beginning assignments and I turned in all my homework. I'm going to make this count and say that somehow it was this class that finally gave me that epiphany of my flaw in character. I'm disappointed that I didn't find this flaw earlier last year but perhaps I was still too immature to notice or I did know and wasn't mature enough to acknowledged it. This realization is very much an important good thing that happened this semester. I want to say for my second good thing would be my realization of the necessary of the creation of a good, dedicated work ethic. Yes, I slacked in this class if it was not obvious enough. I apologize. This class is the very basic demonstration that practice and time brings results.  The third good thing that came out of this class (I'm sorry, though I really have no reason to be) is I learned I really don't care for math. At least now I know in future schedule planning to lighten my ambitions at the math and science subjects. There is really a pretty large difference my English grade in comparison to my Math grade; This is probably due to be interest in it and the will I had in putting in effort. I'm a firm believer that if one really tried one can achieve and this is demonstrated in my grade differences. I willingly retain pounds of information of dead people in history yet refuse waste that brain space memorizing an equation. Shame on me I know, but now I've realized and acknowledged this and I am glad of it.

Next semester, I hope in my final realization of my character I will be able to improve in my focus and dedication to this subject. I also wish to open a larger door in my acceptance of mathematical logic ( I work so much better in an abstract world than a logical one). Lastly, I hope that his realization and will I currently have will stay with me and not fade away after I finish composing this reflection, that this attitude isn't created in my pleasure of composing this piece.

I believe at this point I have acknowledged all the points you have wished me to. You probably really just wanted me to write: Next semester I will try to do all my HW assignments more dedicatedly and consistently. Sorry, that didn't happen. You're ending up with this instead. At this point, this thing is pretty tedious and long so I don't know if you have even read to this point with the mass amounts of these you are collecting. I do apologize for my lack of effort and greatness of attitude toward math. I pray next semester I do end up demonstrating differently. It would truly be shameful if I didn't after this reflection. Thank you, Mr. Shack, for putting up with this.


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